Emigration is one of the most difficult life decisions a person can make. It requires sacrifice, brings uncertainty and shakes you out of your familiar rhythm of life. Along with the practical challenges of a new country comes a silent companion that often weighs the most: loneliness. Even if you are surrounded by people, the absence of your family, your language and your culture can create a sense of isolation.

The good news is that there are practical ways to alleviate loneliness and build stronger bonds – even across borders.

1. Acknowledge your emotions

The first step in dealing with loneliness is to acknowledge it. Many expats feel they need to “be strong” without complaining because they’ve been given the chance to build a new life elsewhere. But admitting that you miss your loved ones doesn’t mean you are ungrateful – it simply means you are human. By admitting your feelings you can also take steps to deal with them, rather than denying them.

2. Create routines that feel familiar

A new country can be overwhelming, and it helps to maintain aspects of your familiar surroundings in your new environment. It can be as simple as having a braai on Sundays, listening to South African music, or preparing your favourite South African dishes abroad. These routines bring a sense of stability and remind you that your culture is still a part of your identity – even if you live far away.

3. Build new networks

In order to overcome loneliness, it is important to form new connections. Join local community organisations, sports clubs, churches or even online groups for expats. AfriForum Worldwide and other diaspora networks offer platforms where you can meet people with similar backgrounds. This not only help to build friendships, but also gives you the opportunity to share advice and support with others.

4. Use technology creatively

The internet makes it possible to stay close even over huge distances. Regular video calls, WhatsApp voice notes or family groups on social media can help overcome the feeling of distance.

Some families even have a weekly “virtual meal” where the respective family members prepare their food at the same time and eat together while they’re on a video call. The more often and creatively you communicate, the stronger the bonds remain.

5. Learn the local language and culture

One of the quickest ways to overcome loneliness is to make an effort to get to know your new surroundings. Learning the local language can help you communicate more easily and build new friendships.

Even small efforts like greeting the cashier in their language or attending local celebrations show that you are willing to engage. This makes the adjustment process easier and helps you gradually develop a sense of “belonging” in your new world.

6. Focus on your health

Loneliness not only affects your mood, but also your physical well-being. Regular exercise, enough sleep and healthy eating habits strengthen your body and mind. This helps reduce stress and improve your energy levels – something that is much needed during the adjustment phase of emigration. Even a short daily walk in your new neighbourhood can make a big difference.

7. Give yourself time to adjust

Nobody simply adjusts overnight. Many experts refer to the “1 000 days theory”: It takes on average three years for someone to truly feel at home in a new country. So be patient with yourself. There will be days when you feel discouraged, but there will also be days when you are proud of how you’ve grown. By having realistic expectations, you can better manage your emotions.

8. Stay connected to your roots

As you get to know your new surroundings, it is equally important to keep your ties to your roots and your mother tongue alive. Intentionally speak Afrikaans in your home, so that it remains a natural part of your family’s daily life. Read Afrikaans books with your children and share stories that shaped your own childhood – this helps them to understand not only the language, but also the values, humour and traditions that is part of it. Music, movies and even simple conversations about how things are done in South Africa contribute to a strong sense of belonging. Celebrate traditional festivals and make favourite dishes that are reminiscent of your country of birth; this way, culture is not only preserved, but also passed on with love.

These small but meaningful practices give children the space to be proud of where they come from, and help your whole family to cultivate an identity that brings both new and old worlds together in harmony.

Emigration is a journey full of contrasts: joy and longing, hope and uncertainty. Loneliness is a natural part of this path, but it doesn’t have to be the dominant part. By building routines, forming new networks, nurturing your culture, and using technology, you can find ways to still feel connected – even across continents. Remember: You may be physically far from your loved ones, but your heart can still remain close.

Also read: When children emigrate: parents and grandparents’ road to adjustment