By Clarice de Jonge

When it feels as if the world has become too small for you and you want to add more meaning to your life, it is a sign that you should make a profound decision and broaden your horizons.

At the end of 2021 I made the bold decision to interrupt my studies and to work as an au pair in the Netherlands for the following year. From October that year I went about obtaining the necessary information and getting my documentation and training in place. During the preparation months I didn’t tell anyone about my plans, as I was too scared of disappointment. Luckily, after what seemed like miracles for everything to fall into place, I excitedly took the next step and departed for the Netherlands.

Reflecting on that decision now, I realise it is something I should incorporate more into my daily life. I undertook to not make my decisions based on the opinions of others, but rather on myself and my own inner voice that guides me. I’ve heard from many top entrepreneurs that one should work in secret and keep people wondering. I can now see why everyone should in fact follow that advice. After arriving in Amsterdam, I decided to share my new adventure on social media. My friends and acquaintances were surprised, some even jealous of the incredible opportunity and experiences that awaited me. Due to the fact that I got everything in place behind the scenes, there was nobody who tried stopping me from reaching my goal, and the reaction when I finally arrived there was definitely worth the silent treatment I received from some people.  

In the Netherlands I realised that my world had suddenly started to feel very small. The thoughts of a new beginning in a strange country were sometimes scary and like a distant dream, but I consoled myself with the thought that I could always return to South Africa. I am so thankful that I didn’t give up and that I accepted the challenge with open arms and succeeded. My time in Amsterdam was unbelievable, and I experienced so much and had such personal growth – I am looking forward to all the new adventures I still want to explore.

Being back in South Africa, I realise every day to what extent these experiences helped to improve and reshape me as a person. I realised that I had been very uncertain of myself, my field of study as well as the university group which I found hard to associate with. After my au pair year, during which I had to look after myself, I came back to tackle my second year of studies with renewed vigour. The realisation of the big impact the year had on my life was incredible and I realised that I no longer needed the approval of others. I was happy with myself, and my newfound confidence opened many doors for me. The au pair year meant a lot for me as a person. I returned to South Africa with a new appreciation for my family, children, my faith, money, and the everyday privileges that people tend to forget.  

My top six tips:

1. Use a reliable agency, I made use of The Au Pair.
2. Be aware that you will possibly miss your family, that way you will be prepared for those times when you will feel sad or alone. It is normal.
3. Spend your money on whatever you want. Don’t be irresponsible, however, I still think back to when I was at Angelina’s in Paris, and I wish I had bought some of the pastries that I didn’t want to buy because of the price. Money comes back but memories stay for ever.
4. Exercise three times a week. Exercise is 1,5 times more effective than any anti-depressant a doctor can prescribe. Look after yourself!
5. Knock on your neighbours’ doors! I of course had good friends in different towns, but when I felt a little down on weekdays or just wanted to hang out with a friend, I could pop over to one of my neighbours who I met simply because I dared to introduce myself.  
6. If you don’t feel well, go to the doctor! The Dutch think that a paracetamol can fix everything and a trip to the doctor is a waste of time. I felt almost ashamed to go to the doctor with a sore throat and therefore didn’t go – only to find out later that the sore throat caused pneumonia. Listen to your body and not to other people.
7. Keys are the most important thing ever! Get something you can hang around your neck so you will realise when you lose it. Also put a check system in place to ensure you don’t forget anything.  

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Photo: Red Morley Hewitt/ Unspalsh