The bitter, the sweet, and the bittersweet of emigration
By Charles Keyser
We emigrated to Australia in 2004. Where do we find ourselves now after all this time? This is our journey.
We left South Africa (like many other people probably) because the bitterness of the alienation and displacement due to the country’s decline (in our eyes) started dominating the sweetness of our familiar, established life.
We touch down in Adelaide in May 2004, unemployed and with two small daughters. We feel that we don’t fit in. We feel awkward and things function differently. And the pain of leaving South Africa behind sits just below the surface. The bitterness of alienation and displacement now takes on a different form and intensity.
Bewildered, we jump into action and put our talents to use. We get jobs, make Aussie friends, drive around to explore the country, etc. As we plant our roots the bitterness diminishes, and the sweetness grows.
After about five years we feel in control and on course. We feel we have a place in our new country and that we are making a contribution. Things are sweet.
Incidentally, the first real test about on how we have adjusted comes in 2014 when we go back to South Africa for the first time. We mostly feel like tourists, and it is a relief.
After 15 years our perception starts to change. A feeling of alienation takes hold, despite the fact that we have settled nicely.
A lot of this re-alienation has to do with the Australian way of thinking. It is different on a deep level and difficult to explain comprehensively – I suppose you have to live here for a decade or so to see it and to feel it. One example is that they have a deep-rooted belief that “We deserve this or that.” Intrinsically. South Africans think in terms of “We should strive.” You are not entitled to anything.
After being here for 18 years we realised: We are “here” but not “from here.” Residents and squatters simultaneously.
South Africa lives in our bones; Australia in our senses.
Life here is bittersweet.
And that is good.
Greetings from Australia
Charles and Maritha Keyser
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