Leaving your country is not always a dream, sometimes it is a necessity. Sometimes you move not because you want to, but because you have to. This is Tanja’s story: a story of calling, loss, survival and longing that does not disappear with time.

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My name is Tanja – a very Afrikaans spelling, and difficult for the people here in the United Arab Emirates to read and pronounce.

I moved to the UAE three years ago, and I still cry over South Africa as if I just moved yesterday.

“If someone asks me what I do for a living, I still answer: I am a social worker in South Africa.” In my heart and soul, I am still a social worker. In South Africa, it was meaningful – to me and to the people and children whose lives I was able to touch every day. I was a voice for children who could not speak for themselves.

But today, social workers in South Africa sometimes only get a salary when the department decides to pay it, and even then, it is small. It is simply not enough for a single person to live on. That’s why I had to move.

Then a door opened that I still see as a blessing: a job at a school in Abu Dhabi as a “special needs” teacher. It is good. Sometimes it feels as if I can make a difference, but not in the same way as when I was a voice for children. Still, I am grateful: I am safe, I was able to buy my own car and even afford petrol.

But the loneliness … it is something no one can prepare you for. I am not married and do not have children – I am alone. The people here come from different cultures and languages. They do not understand what you mean by “the robot is red” or what a “braaibroodjie” is.

Then you try to motivate yourself with the thought: “At least you can build up a pension now”. You are safe. You are more financially stable.

But you are far away.

Far from your people.
Far from your language.
Far from your culture.

I miss you, South Africa.

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Tanja’s story reminds us that emigration is not always about adventure – sometimes it is about survival. It is about dignity, safety and the hope of stability. But it never takes away the longing.

Also read: Out and about: an email from New Zealand